Safety red flags (deal-breakers)
- Anything at odds with safe sleep. According to the AAP, babies should sleep on their back on a firm, flat surface with no incline and no soft toys, pillows, blankets or other bedding. It states that weighted swaddles, weighted clothing and weighted objects on or near the baby are unsafe, and that nothing shows commercial devices marketed to lower SIDS risk actually do so. Don’t follow a plan that relies on any of these, or that props a baby up or tilts them.
- Suggesting medication or supplements for sleep. Melatonin, antihistamines and “natural” sleep products have no place in coaching. Medicine questions belong with your pediatrician or pharmacist. Read is melatonin safe for babies.
- Making diagnoses. “That’s silent reflux,” “that’s a tongue tie,” “that’s sleep apnea.” When a consultant hears about snoring, pauses in breathing or slow weight gain, they should refer you to your pediatrician rather than name a condition.
- Sleep training a newborn. With newborns the work should be about foundations: safe sleep, feeding on cue and a simple routine. That means no leaving a newborn to cry and no stretching out feeds.
Honesty red flags
- A “guarantee” in the marketing but nothing in writing. When a result is promised, the precise wording belongs in the agreement you sign.
- Titles that sound medical but aren’t. Someone calling themselves a “sleep doctor” or “pediatric sleep specialist” without being a physician or a sleep-medicine clinician. Ask what the credential is and who granted it.
- “Never any tears.” Most babies protest when something about bedtime changes. An honest consultant will tell you how much to expect and what you’ll do about it.
- Fuzzy on the method. If they can’t explain night one in plain language, you’ll be guessing once it comes.
- Reviews that can’t be verified. First names only, no dates, and no way to know whether the reviewer was ever a client.
- Research-sounding claims with no source. Ask where any number came from.
Process red flags
- An intake without health questions. A proper intake covers growth, feeding, reflux, prematurity and breathing.
- Every baby of a given age gets the same plan. In that case you’re paying for a template rather than a consultant.
- Support that vanishes after the first day. Ask how often they’ll check in, by what channel, and for how long.
- Pressure tactics. “Just two spots left today,” or a discount that disappears in an hour. You should have time to read the agreement and think it over.
- Being told to stop consulting your pediatrician. A consultant works with your pediatrician, never as a replacement.
Green flags worth looking for
- A named person who writes a plan specifically for your baby.
- Intensive, bootcamp-style coaching ahead of the first night, then daily check-ins.
- A measurable result guaranteed in writing, with a refund if it isn’t met.
- An intake that asks genuine health questions and a readiness to say “check with your pediatrician first.”
- A clear explanation of how crying is handled, fitted to your limits.
- Dated reviews from families you can identify.
We built Actually Sleeping around that list. Dr. Sam, a pharmacist licensed in Pennsylvania, writes every plan and never recommends medication for sleep. Your custom plan sets how night feeds are handled, based on your baby’s age. On our video reviews page you can watch 129 families talk about their experience. For the complete set of questions, read how to choose a sleep consultant.
Our approach at Actually Sleeping: Every plan follows AAP safe sleep guidance and never involves medication. Dr. Sam provides bootcamp-style coaching before night one, with daily 1:1 check-ins and naps coached until they are solid. The outcome is guaranteed in writing: “We guarantee that your baby will sleep 8–12 hours through the night within 14 days of consistent, correct implementation of your sleep plan.” If not, you get a full refund. Book a free consultation and put every question on this page to us.
Want your baby sleeping like this?
With Actually Sleeping you get 1:1 coaching: Dr. Sam writes a sleep plan for your baby, we coach you bootcamp-style before the first night, and we check in daily until it is working. We have coached 700+ families, collected 129 video reviews, and put our guarantee in writing: 8–12 hours through the night within 14 days, or a full refund.
Common questions
Should I worry if a sleep consultant isn’t a nurse or doctor?
No. The majority of sleep consultants aren’t licensed health care providers, and what they do is behavioral coaching. The red flag is a consultant behaving like a clinician: making diagnoses, suggesting medication, or overruling your pediatrician.
Is it okay for a sleep consultant to recommend a particular sleep product?
Proceed carefully. Any product that tilts the baby, adds weight to the baby, or claims to lower SIDS risk goes against AAP guidance. A plan should need nothing more than a plain crib or bassinet with a fitted sheet.
What if a consultant tells me my newborn should be sleeping through the night?
Treat that as a red flag. Newborns need night feeds. Work in the early weeks should center on safe sleep, feeding on cue and a simple routine, which is exactly how Actually Sleeping approaches newborns.